Watching The Office

Hey, how I’ve missed these losers!

The Office opens up Season 5 with a company-wide weight loss competition for the summer. Corporate is awarding the winning branch five days off. But predictably, and in true Scranton style, they lost to Uthica. I got to that part right away because that’s not exactly the best thing(s) about this episode.

This week, the one hour premiere had plenty of stories to fill our yearning for fresh new episodes. One notable thing they did last night? Every cast member appeared on this episode!

I’ll break down what has happened in parts, by starting with Stanley, after this cut…

STANLEY

Showing a picture of how he looked when he was younger, Stanley was really into the program and did lose weight to better himself. He took the stairs instead of the elevator, did a few leg crunches and refused to eat cake. By the end of the summer, Stanley lost seven pounds. And he’s going to celebrate this by taking a week off.

PHYLLIS

She is now the head of the Party Planning committee. Knowing Angela’s best kept secret (her affair with Dwight) has its perks. I guess Angela had no choice but to relinquish her authority over to Phyllis. Anyway, Phyllis’ weight loss attempt did not have any success, so Dwight had to deceive her in order to involuntarily have her  walk five miles and burn fat off. Disgusted, Phyllis calls corporate and reports this incident.

MICHAEL and HOLLY

HR Holly steps in and conducts a session on how this summer project was supposed to be done. But as usual, Michael steals the show and conducts his own session, complete with a fat suit. This was supposed to encourage the staff to take this weight loss competition seriously. But I can never learn from Michael and his training sessions, as I’m sure it’s the same for you, too. And watching this show for five seasons, you already know how this always ends up — with Michael making a fool of himself and nobody learning anything.

Jan appears briefly. It isn’t established if they are together but Holly is quite curious as to who this woman is. Holly’s fondness for Michael is obvious to us watching it. But Michael is so clueless.

When Holly began dating Oscar’s gym instructor, he felt a little jealous and blamed Jim for giving him advice on “how to be friends first and lovers later”.

But I don’t think Holly was really into Oscar’s friend. She got two tickets to a Counting Crow concert she said she planned Gym Instructor and her see together. And I really think she wanted Michael to go with her and it didn’t matter that Gym Instructor didn’t call her back.

When she showed Michael those tickets, I thought it was Michael’s window…he can swoop in and offer to be her date instead. But the jerk that he is, Michael blew his chance.

And should it wonder you why Holly seems drawn to Michael…well, Jim said it best — Holly, with all her pretty looks, kindness and smartness, is kind of a dork. I mean, she beat-boxed! She beat-boxed with Michael! I love her a whole lot more for this.

Speaking of Holly, she finally comes to realize Kevin isn’t retarded. Angela was hosing down Kevin for something work-related and Holly steps in to defend him by accidentally also blurting out that Angela needs to be kind to Kevin because he’s mentally challenged.

Did Holly just say Kevin is “mentally challenged”?	(To Holly) Did you think I’m mentally retarded?

Aaawkward.

DWANGELA and ANDY

While Andy is busy making wedding preparations to the “wedding he has been dreaming of since he was a little boy” (hilarious!!!), Angela and Dwight are sneaking off to the stockroom basement doing what they’re not supposed to.

It’s very clear Angela has no real intentions of marrying Andy. But I’m also not sure if Andy really wants to marry her…or loves the whole idea of having a wedding? I did not realize Andy is such a girl!

OSCAR, CREED and MEREDITH

We saw little of Oscar, Creed and Meredith but at least they are also in this episode. But I am curious as to what happened to Meredith’s face. It wasn’t explained last night so maybe we’ll get a deleted scene of this sometime?

JIM and PAM

We know what would happen to them before this episode aired. Pam was leaving Scranton and was going to study in New York. She and Jim would be having a long distance relationship and they would be keeping in touch via Instant Messaging. What many of us didn’t know is that Jim just got down on his knees and proposed under the rain. (Well, it was in the spoilers but I didn’t think it was happening last night!)

But this guy Pam has met at school and made friends with…is he potential trouble? You know what? He has a striking resemblance to Roy, do you agree?

RYAN and KELLY

With Pam’s position opened, the company hired an office temp who Michael didn’t like. So guess who is Scranton’s newest receptionist? RYAN!

And now Ryan, Michael…and even Dwight are beard buddies!

Only, Ryan shaved his beard off after seeing the same style on Michael.

KELLY

Since now that he’s back in Scranton, he’s reunited with Kelly, who made it very clear to him she was with Daryll, still. In the weight loss challenge, by the way, Kelly starved herself silly by taking nothing but cleansing juices. She actually passed out.

She also ate tapeworms Creed told her to take (Creed to camera: It’s not tapeworm) because it’s supposed to make her thin in three months. Kelly is doing this to her body because apparently, she just bought a bikini in size 2.

And lastly…

TOBY

He did hike off to Costa Rica but met an accident the first week he was there. He’s staying in a hospital bed for the most part of his vacation and has not even seen the beaches!

Did I forget anybody?

How much did you enjoy The Office’s return?